Corn Hole Sunday (Cock Lighter)

Okay you dirty minded people, I was NOT going to go “there” … corn hole is actually a game I discovered since moving to Florida. You can look it up on Wiki, it exists. It’s two wooden boards with a hole in it and you toss these bean bag looking things and try to get them to land on the board or in the hole for points.

There is a group of regulars who get together Sunday afternoon at small little hole in the wall bar to play “corn hole.” Well, I am not much into athletics (giggle), so I sit on the sidelines and talk to people, bitch about the week and indulge in a few adult beverages to combat the heat.

This last Sunday, the conversation took a turn for the dirty when one of my new friends showed up with a lighter shaped like a penis. It was a lighter on one end and the other end controlled the vibrator feature. Needless to say we had a lot of chuckles, photos and a lot of talk about sex.

Mrs. Cock Lighter has been married a couple of times and claims to have had a very wild youth that included a lot of sex. These days, her interest level is lacking and that prompted a conversation about female Viagra. Yes, it does exist however you can also use the male version. How do I know this? I dated a gynecologist for a while and there was a bit of recreational usage (you have to love sample packages). Yes, it does work, however if you have a tendency towards migraines I would not recommend it. I tried both Viagra and Cialis and because they work as a vasodilator and at the moment of orgasm I was hit with horrible migraines. Trust me, it’s not sexy to be coming and run to the bathroom to throw up in a 30 second period. But the basics on how it works is the same as with a man, it increases blood flow to your vagina. She was wondering if trying a medication would help increase her desire. Personally, I think desire starts in the mind and then if you need a little help, you turn to medications. Since they are busy looking for a house, he just had surgery on his shoulder, she needs surgery on her back, give it a year and they will be back fucking like bunnies because they are the cutest couple you can imagine.

Hot blonde biker babe does not show up very often, but she is absolutely hysterical! Her husband drops her off and she spends the afternoon with friends and then he picks her up. She was asking if anyone else ever had the experience where they heard a song and it triggered a memory and got them hot and bothered instantly. Well yes, that has happened! However, she told her husband she was excited, he ran to the bathroom to pop a little blue pill and by the time it took effect, the song had ended and so had her mood. Doesn’t that suck! Seriously, why don’t we get a manual when we hit puberty that says you need to fuck like crazy when you are young because after 40/50/60, it’s just touch and go (sometimes literally)?

Hot Latina chick is a hot mess! She is loud, inappropriate and hysterically funny! Her husband is a little older and a very sweet man; however, because of medical issues he doesn’t have the same interest in sex as she does. It’s probably a good thing because he would have already died from a heart attack. Anyway, she stores her favorite vibrator under her pillow. That’s a convenient place to keep it, unless you forget it is there when your kids come to visit, which has happened to her.

So, what did you talk about this last Sunday afternoon?

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