Keeping it Clean!

I spent three hours on the phone last night with a long-term client. Part of the call was the usual naughty stuff, how much he loves seeing a woman in leather, petticoats, dating in his youth and the length of time since his last blowjob. Then, he starts talking about his wife and how he is trying to make things better, he is going to make it work! Evidently when they were married (20+ years ago) he performed general household tasks and she did not always voice adequate appreciation so he stopped. He retreated to his basement recliner, pc and started to talk to other women on the phone because they will actually listen to him.

In recent weeks he has started to listen to how much she would like to have the house a certain way. So, he is trying something new, he is doing a project and then tells her about his accomplishment! Such a good boy!

At this point he couldn’t see me shaking my head and the eye roll. Guys, let me tell you something… if you do the laundry and put every single thing away, women will still notice! I can tell when my supply of panties is almost to the bottom of the drawer and when it is full. You don’t need to leave MY things sitting on the bed for me to notice that you found the washing machine. And, if I have lived with you for more than a year and you don’t know where I keep my panties I will thank you and tell you how much I appreciate you, but in the back of my head I am wondering WTF!

It doesn’t matter if you are with someone twenty years or two, when you both live in the same house and it takes teamwork, mutual appreciation and respect.

Hugs,

boujie

 

Anal Sex (18+)

Last night I met a professional columnist. He started reading some of his questions and responses. He said one of the questions he gets most often is “How soon should I try anal sex with someone I am dating.” I could only shake my head at his response…

Let me provide some insight on one of my favorite topics. This is NOT an activity you spring on someone, trust me it is the quickest way to NEVER EVER gain access to that hole again and most likely will end a relationship if attempted too quickly with someone who is inexperienced.

Anal sex is something that needs preparation, time, knowledge. Yes, you can start with a finger once someone is aroused, but if you really want the experience to be pleasurable for your partner you need to go slow, think really really slow and then go slower. Use lube (and spit is NOT lube!) if you are not comfortable going into a sex store or ordering adult products online, you are not ready for anal sex.

Talk to your partner, don’t just think you can “slip it in.” Fuck no! Talk to them, start by teasing the outside of their asshole with your finger, see how they respond, talk about toys. Once they are comfortable, get a small butt plug and lube it up and slowly insert, pay attention to their response. It may feel a little uncomfortable when you start, but if it is causing pain you are going too fast or doing something wrong. Get them used to the sensation of having a foreign object inserted and removed. Have them wear it for longer periods of time so they can become used to it. One of my favorites is the NJoy Stainless Plug. It quickly adapts to body temperature, it doesn’t take a huge amount of lube and stays lubricated for long periods of time. It has a little handle for easy insertion and removal and can be worn for longer periods of time and no it is not uncomfortable to have in or sit on, the handle just reminds you it is there. It is a little more expensive, but well worth the investment if this is something you are interested in pursuing. Using the NJoy I was able to train to have anal orgasms and trust me, when you start having those kinds of sensations it will make your partner much more open to having a cock, dildo, strap-on/dildo in their ass.  

Your partner must be relaxed and trust you. If they are concerned about the hygiene of the activity, then an enema will help. That’s a whole other topic, but not that complicated. Keep in mind that what happens in porn is with people who have had a lot of experience regardless of them saying it’s their “first time”…  If you are afraid of a little poo on your cock, you shouldn’t be putting it in someone’s ass. As always, safe sex is always advisable.

Anal sex can be amazing with the right person. There are so many nerves and the sensations can be incredible. Just take your time and practice. If you can get in their head, most likely you can get in their ass.  

Happy fucking!

boujie

Race Play

I was living in Los Angeles and at a crossroads in my life when I met a nice couple. They explained they were into “Race Play.” Now, keep in mind I was raised in Texas and taught to be a good southern girl (yeah right). Anyway, I asked for an explanation, because for me racism is the ultimate in offensive behavior. He explained that he was a successful white man in his 40’s and had a young nigger slave in her early 20’s who was kept naked when in the house and performed duties as instructed. He was looking for a white woman who understood his fascination with owning a nigger slave and would enjoy submitting to him and Dominating her. Interesting concept, let me get back with you.

I did a little research, because let’s face it, being raised in Texas the “N” word is not something we take lightly. Maybe some people do when they are with like-minded people; however, I was raised in a college town, I had friends from all over the world, different religions, nationalities, races, gender, sexual orientation, etc., I am grossly offended by people who truly hate other people based on those things. So, I did a little more research. And, I verified his credentials (if you ever read this, yes I did).

Anyway, I agreed to meet them and get to know more about their fetish. It was SUCH an extreme for me personally, I was curious. So, I went to the Hollywood Hills and was greeted by the black girl that I had seen in photos. We all talked for a while, getting to know each other and had a wonderful meal prepared by the slave girl. He sat across the table from me and I asked them both questions. She sat at the head of the table completely naked as the day she was born. He explained how they met. She had known she was a slave since she was 15 years old and she needed a white Master.

We met multiple times after that. She was adorable and very ticklish (which she didn’t like) and I guess that brought out a bit of sadist in me because I truly loved tickling her. We had a few sexual encounters and they did have a well-stocked armoire in the bedroom filled with toys for me to choose from to use on her. Cuffs, rope, vibrators, clamps, oh my!

A few years have passed and I was checking to see how they were doing and found out she had been released from service and he is involved with a white woman who is similar in age and has the same proclivities that he does, she loves nigger pussy.

Come on, talk dirty to me, what is your ultimate taboo?

Boujie xoxo

  

The Big Cock! (18+)

Earlier today, I posted a blog about the little things that keep a relationship going. My own personal rantings of sort. 

I have had a friend since I was in my early 20’s, I told him about me talking dirty for a living and the irony is that we used to work together at a very conservative company. He has been through three marriages since we met, one wife died of cancer and I have been through multiple relationships. He has called me on Fridays on and off throughout the years to wish me a “Happy Friday” and touch base.

Today, he shared a fantasy with me.

“In my fantasy with you, you would have a nice bottle of champagne and a bowl of cut fruit and soft silky robe or sundress on. I would be kissing you all over your beautiful body as you carried on your conversation.”

What a fantasy! Unfortunately, I have heard that more than once from other people. The thing is, if people had nice normal fantasies, they would just tune in to Xhamster and watch a little porn, wack off and get on with life. What I listen to, generally the normal population doesn’t want to hear it. I am not saying it’s all over the edge, but I can only think of one client that he would enjoy listening to. That particular client is an attorney (yes, sometimes I am guilty of checking people out, especially when they have a sexy voice), anyway, this client calls me after meetings sometimes. Especially when multiple women are present and he has been thinking about what they have on under their clothes and how naughty they can be. What color is their lingerie, do the panties and bra match, lace or silk? Would they enjoy him giving them oral pleasure, would they talk dirty, would they swallow? For me, this is pretty tame stuff!

The champagne and fruit would probably go to the side if he started listening to men who wanted to be forced to suck another man off, be gang raped by 10 or more black men or one who was sitting there dressed in women’s clothing with a plug up their ass in a dirty/wet diaper.

Most cocks aren’t as big as in porn and most fantasies are bigger than porn. Have you ever gotten off thinking about Wonder Woman (I did), what about a Playboy Bunny? Those are tame…

What is your kink my friends?

Come on, talk dirty to me… send me an email you little closet perverts. I’ll let you know how normal you are (or not) and keep your privacy! Speaking of which, I was paid a very nice tip to post an ad on a very public site outing someone for their wicked twisted thoughts. Naughty, naughty!

Hugs,

Boujie xoxo

 

 

 

 

The Little Things

I’ve spent years of my life trying to find out not just the difference between good guys and bad, but good people and bad. I don’t think it is that simple. There is no black and white, no particular deed that makes an earth-shattering difference.

I think it comes down to the way people make you feel. It’s the little things that show you are cared for, protected, valued and loved. Those are the people we stay with and make the difference between smiles and tears.

Last week, I was washing clothes and ran into one of the guys that runs in a circle of friends. I was putting my clothes in the dryer and he was washing a mattress cover and pad. I was complimenting him for his attention to detail and he started telling me that he was going to Kentucky to pick up a girl that he had been seeing for a while and she was going to stay with him for a few months while her kids were at their dad’s house. He said she was a nice girl from a small town and asked if they could stop by state signs so she could have her picture taken in each of the states. In addition, she asked if she could stop and get a Georgia peach on the way. He admitted he never would have even thought of something simple like that meaning so much. He has traveled the world with the military and doesn’t think twice about crossing a few state lines.  

Yesterday, we were all sitting around at a little corner bar and she is there and just as cute as she could be. He is playing cornhole but he certainly keeps an eye on her seeing to her needs. One of my friends was talking about getting a pedicure and he suggested she go and make a girl’s day of it. She was so excited for a little pampering it was getting a gift Christmas morning. About an hour later he walks up to me and my friend and asks us for a favor. Would we take her shopping? Now, personally I hate to shop and avoid it at all costs. If I cannot find it online, then it has to be a desperate situation for me to walk into a store. My friend is the opposite; she lives to shop! He said she came with one bag and she needs more clothes and things that appropriate for this climate. I can certainly understand that, between the heat and humidity everything I brought when I moved here there were only a few things that were comfortable so I certainly understand her needing some things. What was so profound was that HE understood that and was taking care of her.

This is a man who worth keeping! Not because he is willing to spend a little money, but because he is thinking of her and what would make her happy.

Most women that I know and have talked with throughout the years, we don’t care about having a big fancy ring, it’s always about the little things, it’s how you make us feel.

If you want a woman in your life, don’t leave the quilt on your bed that your ex girlfriend gave you and make her sleep under it. It doesn’t matter how pretty it is, you need to understand that she will feel that she is second best in your life every single day. If she takes a photo of you that she wants to put it out because it reminds her of a very special day, don’t tell her you hate it. Especially when you have a photo that your ex took prominently displayed on your bookcase. If you plan a vacation, try to make it someplace special and not the same place you have taken every other woman you’ve been with. If you think we can’t figure it out, look on your bookcase and notice the books with photos the ex gave you as gift to remember those special trips with you, or the calendar marked with your special anniversary. If you see them there, trust me we will have noticed them too.

Let’s face it, anyone over 40 has some relationship history. This isn’t about jealousy, drop your ego for a minute and think about it. It’s not about who you were with or what you did. It’s about how you make the person you are with right now feel. Do you tell the ex when she calls that you are dating something (when you’ve actually been living with the new woman for close to a year), the one sitting there when you take the call and say hear her say “Hey baby” and “I love you”…

One more thing, if someone is being rude to the person you are with. If you stand there and let it happen without saying anything, that sends a very strong message. “You aren’t worth fighting for.”

That is the difference between having someone you are with stay or go.

Fuck my mind, please!

It is obvious that men and women view sex differently. Generally, men view it as a physical pleasure and most women connect emotions to it (not all the time, but generally speaking, which is why so many books have been written on the differences between genders.

Today, I want to talk about the difference between physical and mental sex. Most of us have figured out how to masturbate, some better and more often than others! But there are those of us who crave something more and I am talking about more than just the physical act of sex, what I am talking about is the mental side of sexual pleasure.

For me, if you can get into my head, I can have pleasure and satisfaction that is beyond bliss without even being touched in a sexual way. Most of that comes from my personal Dominance /submission desires. I am a situational switch, meaning I can Dominate others; but in the corners of my mind in the darkness of night, I NEED to submit. Not to just anyone because it’s not any particular physical act. It’s the process of getting into my mind and that is a very rare thing 

There is nothing more erotic to me than the feel of a hand on the back of my neck pulling my head back and a passionate kiss. That makes me go weak in the knees and all those girlie parts tingle.

I want more, I need more. I need to have that deep sexy growl in my ear telling me to be a good girl for Daddy. And no, I don’t have “daddy” issues, it is a dynamic between two people. That is not the only trigger for me, but it certainly has its time and place.  

I have tried so many times to explain Dominance and submission to people, but most think that it has to do with binding someone’s hands or spanking them on the ass. That can be part of the physical, but for me real D/s comes from how you get in my mind.

What do you need?

boujie

 

Hurricane Matthew

My apologies for neglecting this most precious space. I live in a condo building and the building sustained substantial damage during the hurricane. We were very fortunate, there was no loss of life, but several families lost their homes.

Now that services have been restored, I can try to get back here to my passion.

Thank you in advance for your patience and understanding.

Hugs,

boujie